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Thread: got to thinking about the Olde Timer....Beowulf.

  1. #1
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    Default got to thinking about the Olde Timer....Beowulf.

    My mind and musings got to running down various rabid trails..and I realized I'd not heard or seen Beowulf's posts on this forum in some time.

    Wondering if things are ok with him and his house ..as ok as can be under his circumstances.


    Have any of the members here heard from Beowulf....and or have an updates status on the Olde Timer???


    Concerned here in Virginia,

    Orangetom

    Not an Ishmaelite.

  2. #2
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    He had a post on here earlier today. I think it was on the Bug Out thread.
    Greater love hath no man than this, That a man lay down his life for a friend.
    John 15:13

  3. #3
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    I'm still here, OT. Just been busy, my daughter and I, trying to tie all the loose ends together after Sandy passed away. Plus, still trying to adjust to her not being here with me any longer. I'm learning to cope. Its a long and difficult road to travel. Sandy and I were so very close, and we were only two months and one week away from our fiftieth wedding anniversary the day she died. That has really hit hard because we were looking so forward to that day with happiness, joy, excitement and anticipation. To lose her so close to so special a day has just really knocked the wind from my sails. Its still a chore right yet to find much initiative for much of anything. But, I'm getting better little by little, day by day. This is the darkest and most difficult time of my entire life, but I try to remember that she told me several times during the last few months that she just wanted me to be happy and enjoy my life, and take care of our kids. I promised her I would, and I don't break promises. To do any less would tarnish her sweet and precious memory. There are just so many adjustments to make, so much different to become accustomed to and with. But don't worry about me. I'm ok...not really alright, but ok. I'll get better as time goes on, but life will never be the same for me again. The love we had for one another...and I still do for her...the happiness and joy we found in just being together are rare and precious things. You just don't find such today. Thank you for your concern, but don't worry about me. I've got my two girls, my grand children and great grand children, and they keep me pretty well occupied. We spend a lot of time together. At times like this close family ties are so important. And most important of all is the strength of our faith and trust in our Lord and Savior, Jesus. He is my rock and holds me up when I can't hold myself up. So, again, thanks for your concern, but I'm still here and not planning ongoing anywhere. And I'm hoping and praying that your path of grief you must still be walking is getting easier.

  4. #4
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    He's probably just busy milking black widow spiders......
    Don't bring skittles to a gun fight.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by flock6 View Post
    He's probably just busy milking black widow spiders......
    Well, yeah, that too. Its really a chore trying to get them to cooperate. (YUK, YUK!!)

  6. #6
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    Ahhh....Olde Timer.....ok....good to hear from you. I was at my lady friends grave and talking to her..as I am want to do...when I realized that you did similar and also that I'd not seen your posts in a number of days. Could have been just me busy on this end but I noted it with some concern.

    Yes...it gets easier to a point. It is lonely without my lady friend.

    I have been to a couple of ball games with and for her grand daughter and plan to go to one of her children's birthday dinners at a local restaurant this week...it is good to see them and see them happy and coping. But she would want them..her children standing watch over her grandchildren and coping....standing.....continuing on...for the grandchildren...for their namesake.

    I miss her terribly Olde Timer. For in her I found Peace...Rest....Comfort from the outside world. A drug...a drug of choice if you like...and one for which I am not prepared to get off it.




    But I gotta warn you Olde Timer....I reckon I have been off the marketplace for some time and am not accustomed to aggressive women.


    Went to a get together..and it appears that it does not take long for the word to get out among certain women...that the marketplace has changed.....the landscape in availability. Apparently some of them are very quick to pick up on this information.
    Had a woman get real friendly and just plop down in my lap...and caught me verily off guard. I was not prepared for that.

    I've been told that many women today can be quite aggressive. I am not out in the field hunting and gathering ...again so to speak...so it caught me verily off guard.

    Just a warning Olde Timer...that today the male is not necessarily the "Hunter Gatherer." Just tuck that away in your files for future use.
    Be Warned.


    My lady friend..had she been there.....the hair on the back of her neck would be standing out and the claws extending ready to defend her sovereign territory....The Queen Bee as I would often call her in jest. But she never joked about competition...or marking out her territory...as the primordial history and or tradition goes.


    I am often saying that I need to get out more. Not sure I am ready for this out there.




    Thanks for getting back to me...

    Yes..I too am coping..as best I can.


    Orangetom

    Not an Ishmaelite
    Last edited by orangetom1999; 04-30-2019 at 04:33 AM.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by orangetom1999 View Post
    Ahhh....Olde Timer.....ok....good to hear from you. I was at my lady friends grave and talking to her..as I am want to do...when I realized that you did similar and also that I'd not seen your posts in a number of days. Could have been just me busy on this end but I noted it with some concern.

    Yes...it gets easier to a point. It is lonely without my lady friend.

    I have been to a couple of ball games with and for her grand daughter and plan to go to one of her children's birthday dinners at a local restaurant this week...it is good to see them and see them happy and coping. But she would want them..her children standing watch over her grandchildren and coping....standing.....continuing on...for the grandchildren...for their namesake.

    I miss her terribly Olde Timer. For in her I found Peace...Rest....Comfort from the outside world. A drug...a drug of choice if you like...and one for which I am not prepared to get off it.




    But I gotta warn you Olde Timer....I reckon I have been off the marketplace for some time and am not accustomed to aggressive women.


    Went to a get together..and it appears that it does not take long for the word to get out among certain women...that the marketplace has changed.....the landscape in availability. Apparently some of them are very quick to pick up on this information.
    Had a woman get real friendly and just plop down in my lap...and caught me verily off guard. I was not prepared for that.

    I've been told that many women today can be quite aggressive. I am not out in the field hunting and gathering ...again so to speak...so it caught me verily off guard.

    Just a warning Olde Timer...that today the male is not necessarily the "Hunter Gatherer." Just tuck that away in your files for future use.
    Be Warned.


    My lady friend..had she been there.....the hair on the back of her neck would be standing out and the claws extending ready to defend her sovereign territory....The Queen Bee as I would often call her in jest. But she never joked about competition...or marking out her territory...as the primordial history and or tradition goes.


    I am often saying that I need to get out more. Not sure I am ready for this out there.




    Thanks for getting back to me...

    Yes..I too am coping..as best I can.


    Orangetom

    Not an Ishmaelite
    I've never been much of a "social creature", preferring the company of a few fiends or family. One thing I use as sort of a hedge against any aggressive women is that I still wear my wedding ring. Mostly out of my deep love for Sandy. I love her as deeply as ever, perhaps more so with each passing day. Love, real love, is a living, breathing thing and one doesn't turn it off like a water faucet. The kind of love Sandy and I shared is eternal. People today, especially the younger ones, haven't the capacity to understand that kind of love. The sanctity and sacredness of marriage is viewed much differently today. I've heard some refer to marriage as an "institution". It isn't. Its a condition of the heart and soul, something extremely beautiful, comforting, and completes one's life in ways nothing else can. To give one's self to another completely, holding nothing back, without reservation, and have the other respond in kind is something beautiful beyond explanation or description. That's what Sandy and I had...and I still have. There is no substitute. The other reason I still wear my wedding ring is that I'm not looking. I have no interest in ever marrying again. My ring will stay on my finger until the day I die.
    I still get out, doing the things I need to do. I spend a lot of time in the back yard with my bow. Its kind of my outlet for my feelings and emotions. To shoot a recurve instinctively, no sights or anything, takes so much concentration to shoot accurately, and it helps...to a point. I also spend a good bit of time with my two daughters, my grand children and great grand children. Our family bond is very tight, and that is so important at such times as this.
    Yeah, I'm quite aware of the aggressiveness of some women in today's society. I call them predators. I can let them know, politely, that I'm not interested. But if they persist I can turn on a ferocity they've never imagined in their worst nightmares. There is a line around me that says "do not cross without permission". Its in their best interest if they heed that warning. And, (heh, heh), as far as tradition goes, I'm more of the cave man mentality than today's "metro male".
    Last edited by beowulf; 04-30-2019 at 11:34 AM.

  8. #8
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    Beowulf,

    I've never been much of a "social creature", preferring the company of a few fiends or family.
    Same.

    Don't know why ...but crowds are not a thing to which I am attracted. ..I never liked big crowds. Where the crowds tend to be I tend to go the other way. Most of my life I've been like that. Small circle of friends and family...ok by me.


    Yeah, I'm quite aware of the aggressiveness of some women in today's society. I call them predators.
    Reckon I'm going to have to learn this line of thought much better....become more familiar with the concept....keep it in an emergency folder...Break Glass and that sort of thing.


    I'm more of the cave man mentality than today's "metro male".
    Yeah...me too...but mostly I prefer a certain amount of solitude or at least alone with the woman of my choosing. The rest of the world can keep going on by as far as I am concerned. With such an woman..I don't have to be a cave man per se...I can be at Rest.....Peace.


    Thanks Olde Timer,

    Orangetom

    Not an Ishmaelite

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by orangetom1999 View Post
    Beowulf,



    Same.

    Don't know why ...but crowds are not a thing to which I am attracted. ..I never liked big crowds. Where the crowds tend to be I tend to go the other way. Most of my life I've been like that. Small circle of friends and family...ok by me.




    Reckon I'm going to have to learn this line of thought much better....become more familiar with the concept....keep it in an emergency folder...Break Glass and that sort of thing.




    Yeah...me too...but mostly I prefer a certain amount of solitude or at least alone with the woman of my choosing. The rest of the world can keep going on by as far as I am concerned. With such an woman..I don't have to be a cave man per se...I can be at Rest.....Peace.


    Thanks Olde Timer,

    Orangetom

    Not an Ishmaelite
    One of the things that is most difficult for me is, when I go somewhere, coming home to an empty house. Always before, I knew when I came home she'd be waiting for me when I got home. Now...sometimes just returning to home is so difficult. Nothing on TV really interests me much anymore, not even the few shows I really enjoyed. And I just can't bring myself to watch any of the shows Sandy and I enjoyed watching together so much. I have a little journal I write in sometimes, when I feel like it. Writing my thoughts and feelings down seem to help somewhat. I'm also writing a book about my and Sandy's life together. Not for publication, but more for the kids and grand kids after I'm gone. I write as the notion strikes me, and it probably isn't in a format a publisher would want anyway, but I don't really care. Its for my kids and grand kids. And I talk to Sandy all the time. It helps, but it can't bring here back. I'm really just groping my way in the dark right now. I know there's light at the end of the tunnel. I just don't know how log the tunnel is going to be. But, as with any long journey, you take it one step at a time. I think of what Sandy would want for me, expect of me, insist I do. I'm trying in every way I can to honor her wishes and desires for me, for our kids, and try to be the kind of man about whom she could say with pride, "that's my husband." That's all I know to do, and let time heal...as much as possible...the grief, heart break and heartache. I know, in time, some sense of normalcy will return. But life without her will never be the same for me ever again. When she died a huge part of me died also. We truly were each one half of the same soul. I just don't know how to describe how close we were any more articulately than that.
    Last edited by beowulf; 04-30-2019 at 09:08 PM.

  10. #10
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    Both you guys are in my thoughts and prayers daily.

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